First off, I want to thank my readers for being patient with me during my hiatus from the WWA blog due to illness and other personal issues. Rest assured, readers, I am back and here to stay. On that note, I’d like to pick up where I left off with this series on workplace bullying and the autistic employee.
Last time, I discussed the basics of workplace bullying: what it is, why bullies do what they do, and the effects that bullying has on employees. This time I’ll be talking about how bullies select their targets, why they may target autistic individuals, and the role that office gossip can play in both bullying campaigns and the everyday work life of an autistic employee. Continue reading
try to unzip me, and see my eyes fleeing away from you
like startled ponies. Do you really
know me? If you did, you would know that
if I look at you too long, I might burst.
(from my poem, “You Don’t See It”)
Some of you may have already read my last post in which I talked about my road to an official Asperger’s diagnosis. A recent conversation that I had with my direct supervisor at work plus the fact that this last Monday was National Coming Out Day in terms of the GLBT community spurred me to think and write about the topic of disclosing an autism spectrum diagnosis.
So far, I have been blessed with understanding people in my family, workplace, and social circles, so I have been relatively comfortable and confident enough to disclose my diagnosis (and before then, my self-identification as having AS). However, I do realize that due to misunderstanding and prejudice, not everyone who has an autism spectrum disorder may be in a position to “come out”, so to speak – so I respect the decisions of those who choose not to reveal, or to reveal selectively, for whatever reasons that they have. I’ll be discussing the benefits and possible drawbacks of disclosing, as well as my own personal experience up to this point.
You’ve been around my entire life, but I’ve never seen you
until now. Everybody else saw you and christened you
crazy, nerdy, or retarded through their own lenses… But I christen you
different, with a middle name of
(from my poem, “An Open Letter to Asperger Syndrome”)
Most of you who have been following me for the last few months probably know that I was a self-diagnosed, self-identified Aspie. Earlier this year, my counselor and I had discussed the very real possibility that I had an autism spectrum disorder. I proposed Asperger Syndrome for several reasons: 1) because I was verbal before age 3 and never lost verbal ability (most with classic autism either lose verbal ability or don’t have it before age 3 or so), and 2) other symptoms, such as obsessive and narrow interests and difficulty with social cues and interaction, also fit me. My counselor agreed, and thus began my journey to an official diagnosis.
Last I checked,
I wasn’t born with apologies – though some would demand
that I wear them for the apocalypses in my DNA.
(From my poem, “Dear Earthling”)
After a bit of a hiatus, I am coming back to you with a post about something that has profoundly affected me for a long time, although I didn’t realize it until earlier this year. To put it another way, I live at the intersection of AS and PTSD.
Now, what do I mean when I say this? For those of you who have been following my blog, you know that I’ve spoken of my childhood and teenage years, which included physical, emotional, mental, and sexual abuse, as well as neglect – most of which happened between ages twelve and eighteen.
Autism Women’s Network is in the running in the Pepsi Refresh Project for a $5,000 grant! If they receive the grant, they plan to host Project FAIM (Female Autistic Insight Mentoring) workshops “which will focus on qualities specific to females on the autism spectrum. Topics will include: peer supports, adolescence, adult life, relationships, vulnerabilities and successful communications.”
Consider that we are underserved, underdiagnosed, and underrecognized. This is a step in the right direction. Please stop by and vote daily for them! http://pep.si/a8PpwM And please tweet this/share this/etc around the interwebs…deadline is August 31!
I know how you
move into me. You come
in tides, squeezing through every pore
like nightfall that doesn’t know how to stay put. You don’t know
how you rip apart my senses, bleeding glorias as you
pass though me in double osmosis.
(From my poem, “Touch”)
If you’re reading this post and are on the autism spectrum, you’re already aware (in some cases painfully) of how sensitive our nervous systems are. This sensitivity affects many aspects of our lives, from difficulty tolerating sensory stimuli to impaired ability in handling stress, as I’ve mentioned in previous posts. I’m going to deal with the sensitive (no pun intended) subject of using medication (such as SSRIs, other classes of antidepressants, and other kinds of medication that affect mood and brain chemicals) in this post.
From what I’ve observed thus far, this topic has been debated from multiple viewpoints, even outside the autism community. Just Google the subject of antidepressants and autism and I’m sure you’ll be overwhelmed by the number of results. Certainly many of us have heard about overuse of these medications and horror stories about side effects, ineffectiveness of medications, or symptoms worsening – or we may have gone through these experiences ourselves. And of course, there is always the question of who benefits by the medication: there are stories of medical professionals pushing such medications to the parents of children on the autism spectrum in order to make their behavior more “tolerable”. And of course for us adults, there’s also the question of something being for our “own good”.
In the last post, I mentioned an article about adults with Asperger’s and employment difficulties which appeared in the Columbus Dispatch on Monday, July 12. I felt moved to write a letter to the editor about the article, which appeared in today’s (Sunday) edition. Go read the letter here.
Normally when I’m presented with a news story about Asperger Syndrome or that in some way covers autism spectrum disorders, I choose to read it and then pass along the information to my friends and subscribers. If you’ve been following WWA, you know that I’ve been systematically tackling topics that affect the lives of many Aspies, especially Aspie women – topics that affect my own life as well. Given that, it seemed appropriate that when this article appeared on the front page of Monday’s Columbus Dispatch, I should not only comment on the article but write about my own experiences in the employment world and with trying to find a job. Continue reading
I consult the dictionary of human behavior every day.
I had to load it into my brain and make it learn
that you open doors with hello and
that you close them with goodbye. I had to learn
the mechanics of when to smile, when to laugh.
(From my poem, “You Don’t See It”)
As a woman, I have been aware (painfully at times) of the expectations that Western society and culture has placed upon us, both past and present. I mentioned some of these expectations in my last post when I talked about Aspie women and our unique challenges navigating the social matrix. Some of those expectations are also applied, along with a few others, to women in the realm of romantic relationships. This week,I will discuss those expectations and the challenges that Aspie women might have meeting them when involved in a close relationship.
There’s definitely, definitely, definitely no logic
To human behaviour
But yet so, yet so irresistible
And there’s no map
And a compass wouldn’t help at all
(Bjork, “Human Behaviour”)
In the last three parts of this series on stress and anxiety, I discussed causes and coping strategies which apply to people with Asperger’s in general. For the next few weeks, I will focus on specific stressors which tend to mostly affect Aspie women. I am speaking generally, of course, and offer this information with the understanding that each woman’s situation is unique. In addition to some external research, I will also be speaking from personal experience, offering examples of some of the challenges I have faced as a woman with Asperger Syndrome.